Boys and men are also survivors of sexual abuse

Amber Stevenson writes for The Tennessean. In her article entitled :  Boys and men are also survivors of sexual abuse states:

There are many myths surrounding unwanted or abusive sexual experiences of boys and men. So what are the facts?

 Girls and women can sexually abuse boys. These boys are not “lucky,” but exploited and harmed.

 If a boy liked the attention he was getting or got sexually aroused during the abuse, this does not mean he wanted or liked being manipulated or abused, or that any part of what happened was his responsibility or fault.

 Boys can be sexually abused by both straight men and gay men. Sexual abuse is the result of abusive behavior that takes advantage of a child’s vulnerability and is in no way related to the sexual orientation of the abusive person.

 Whether he is gay, straight or bisexual, a boy’s sexual orientation is neither the cause nor the result of sexual abuse. By focusing on the abusive nature of sexual abuse rather than the sexual aspects of the interaction, it becomes easier to understand that sexual abuse has nothing to do with a boy’s sexual orientation.

 Boys and men can be sexually abused and it has nothing to do with how masculine they are.

 Most boys who are sexually abused will not go on to sexually abuse others

Some researches say that 1 in 6 boys and men are sexually abused,  personally I believe the figure is much higher…men just don’t report it,  the culture of support is just not there for them to feel comfortable or vulnerable discussing it. But taking that statistic as a starting point that means that in the USA alone, this equates to more than 19 million of our brothers, fathers, sons, partners and friends who are impacted by this problem.


For the complete article in the Tennessean please click here.



  • Doug
    July 2, 2015 at 1:46 pm

    Thank you for bringing Male Sexual abuse out of the shadows!!! People need to become aware, educated and empathic on this horible type of abuse. You are right, the figure is more like 1 in 4 … for individuals who may wish to research this topic, I would suggest reading the Male Survivor forum available at the following link:
    Once again, as a survivor ,, thank you.. The Greatest Journey is the Journey Within … and can be a daily struggle….

  • Holly Otten
    July 4, 2015 at 2:50 pm

    Very good article. However I know of several boys who were sexually abuses and did go on to sexually abuse others- plural.

    • jaklumen
      July 6, 2015 at 11:44 pm

      Of course intergenerational abuse is a thing. I acknowledge that I haven’t always done my best, but as a survivor, I’m still committed to ending the cycle of abuse. My daughter and my wife have already seen what my abusers are capable of. My wife is already a survivor herself, and my daughter has felt the sting of bullying. I owe it to them to not become another statistic that way.

  • theAuthor
    July 8, 2015 at 2:49 pm

    thanks for the link Doug, thanks Holly and jaklumen – well said

Leave a Reply